Erin. 24. Ma. Compassionate. Dreamer. Creative. Writer. Lover. Spiritual.
My blog is a mild interpretation of who I am and what I am about.
I love you and want to be with you but I can’t right now anyway so what’s the point in being right here? So I have to be in love with you while you’re with someone else? Why do I always find myself in other woman situations. For the first time I’ve not acted on any of these feelings even when you’ve blatantly told me you wouldn’t mind if I kissed you or did other things to you. Idk why I’ve had a problem growing balls this whole time and just kissing you and now that I’m leaving and really want to do it you’ve broken my heart slightly by telling me not to. I understand you don’t want to make this any harder than it already is but I want to know it’s real. I want to feel what it feels like to kiss your lips at least once in my life. I won’t let you be the one that got away. I will come back for you or you can come to me. I’m moving five hours away not across the country. I’d drive out twice a month if it would make you feel better. I don’t want to stay stuck here. I’ve committed myself to going because I feel like I need to to better myself and the not person besides myself I want to better myself for is you. You make me want to build that dream house, you make me want to live a happy life with someone so thoughtful and loving. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do or feel in this situation. All I know is that it’s 630am and I slept like shit because I just want to be holding you and I know I want to kiss you so badly now that I’d actually really do it even though you told me not to. My heart is unfamiliar with the territory it’s in even though I’ve been in situations like this plenty of times but you are different, she is different. I know everyone says that I’m sure I’ve said it a handful of times but I know that the fact that I’ve done nothing this whole time we’ve talked about how we like and now I’m sure we both love each other says something to me. You’re the first person to buy me gifts that made me burst into tears because of how thoughtful they were. You don’t understand how much I value everything we have and how hard it is for me to leave that but at the same time you have a boyfriend. I’d rather wait for you somewhere else than have to be right here having to know you’re with someone else. Don’t you think that had broken my heart for the last year? Don’t you think that has been tough for me to deal with? All I’m doing is moving further away from the place we live not from you or anyone else that I love…..sigh
Highly detailed Earth illuminated by moonlight over Saudi Arabia.
i thought i was the only horny sarcastic introverted genius third wheel stuck up asshole until i discovered this blue internet support group and i’ve been an active member of it since then
I don’t want to look back in five years time and think, ‘We could have been magnificent, but I was afraid.’ In 5 years I want to tell of how fear tried to cheat me out of the best thing in life, and I didn’t let it.
"She was what I paid attention to. Who I paid attention to. Everything else was just background"